Are We There Yet?
August 19-25, 2019
By Jay Edwards
Before I begin I need to say spoiler alert if you haven’t seen the latest film from Quentin Tarantino, “Once Upon a Time … in Hollywood.” It is headlined as his ninth film. I assume they refer to movies he’s directed, and they must also be combining “Kill Bill: Volume 1& 2,” into one film, which is the right thing to do.
KM and I saw his new film the day after it came out and I wondered soon after leaving the theater, how I would rank it against the others. So that’s what I did and here they are, from bottom to top.
8. “Jackie Brown.” Why am I starting with eight and not nine? Because I have yet to see “Grindhouse: Death Proof.” So I begin with “Jackie Brown,” which I did like, but it’s my least favorite.
Jackie Brown: Awww, the milk went bad while I was in jail.
7. “The Hateful Eight.” I’ve watched it three times and will again, and it still comes in this low. Because the Tarantino bar is pretty high.
Daisy Domergue: When you get to hell, John, tell them Daisy sent you.
I probably picked this line because I love the name Daisy Domergue so much.
6. “Once Upon a Time … in Hollywood”. One more spoiler alert before I go on. I came out of the theater somewhat let down because I’d been looking forward to it for so long. But I kind of believe I’ll end up loving it and already want to see it again soon. The ending was bittersweet, because, unfortunately, real life tales do not begin with “Once upon a time …” But I still got more satisfaction from this ending than I did when the Bear Jew riddled Hitler with bullets at the end of “Inglorious Basterds.”
Jay Sebring: Is everyone ok?
Rick Dalton: Well ... the hippies aren’t, that’s for sure.
5. “Django Unchained.” I loved seeing Christoph Waltz as a good guy and DiCaprio should have won an Oscar.
Django: Django. The D Is Silent.
4. “Reservoir Dogs.” One of the best scenes from any movie is when the crew is finishing breakfast and Mr. Pink (Steve Buscemi) doesn’t want to leave a tip. Watched it again a few nights ago with KM and her brother DJ, neither of whom had seen it. How is that even possible?
Mr. Blonde: Hey Joe, you want me to shoot this guy?
Mr. White: [laughs] … You shoot me in a dream, you better wake up and apologize.
3. “Inglorious Basterds.” So good and so much credit due to the brilliant Waltz, from the opening at the dairy farm to his negotiations with Brad Pitt near the end.
Col. Hans Landa: You’ll be shot for this!
Lt. Aldo Raine: Nah, I don’t think so. More like chewed out. I’ve been chewed out before.
2. “Kill Bill.” Of all, I’ve probably watched this the most and would stop writing and tune in now if it were on. Beatrix finishes off the last of the Crazy 88s and heads out to the snowy garden to face O-Ren Ishii, in my favorite showdown since Shane killed Jack Wilson.
Hattori Hanzo: I can tell you with no ego, this is my finest sword. If on your journey, you should encounter God, God will be cut.
1. “Pulp Fiction.” As hard as it was ranking the other seven, choosing this spot was easy. Just go watch it again if you disagree. Deserving of two best lines.
Jules: If my answers frighten you then you should cease asking scary questions.
Captain Koons: …Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you.
See all of Jay’s past columns on our website at www.dailyrecord.us.